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$49,999.99 |
Drown out the sound of drum circles and
noisy protesters with one of these state-of-the art sense
deprivation chambers. Recipients of this gift can
lock themselves away in a shell of perfect peace and
relaxation, where they'll be electronically soothed,
comforted, and massaged. |
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NOTE: These devices are not able to block out
feelings of guilt and shame, but this minor glitch
can be temporarily overcome by including a few
bottles of
40 year old Cognac with your gift. |

28,170.00 |
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This
$46,000 baseball autographed by Babe Ruth will score a home run with
any sports lover in your life. This baseball was made in the
United States, unlike the baseballs used in the Major Leagues today,
which are
hand-sewn in a sweat-shop in Costa Rica. |
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Speed up
your inheritance by giving your rich uncle or father-in-law this
white gold, jewel-encrusted,
$40,000 cigar and cigarette lighter. They will be
so eager to show off their sparkling new toy
that they are bound to double or triple the amount of tobacco they
smoke, thereby insuring you a quicker road to their riches.
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